More of You, less of me

Have you ever been in such an irritating situation and you try your best to get out of there but to no avail? Remember how much you asked God to change the situation or to deliver you out of it, yet nothing happened? What's going on??? Probably... God is burning you to take out the impurity so that you will be more like Him!

I experienced this in my current share-house, and it is a christian household, yet there are still conflicts within, and I want to get out of this house to a new place where I don't need to face this situation, but I couldn't find a better place to move into! You know, no matter how hard you try, if God doesn't allow it, nothing is gonna happen. And the opposite applies too, somethings you don't work for but God would give them to you, the greatest of which is your righteousness in Christ, it is the gift of God [Eph 2:9] Anyway, even if I do find a new house it doesn't guarantee that I will not have issue in the new house. Yet, I would be less bothered because I wouldn't expect them to care for the house in the first place, unlike this discipleship house...

But God is telling me to be patient and deal with this a children of God who loves with the love of God, that is kind and patient... Whenever I prayed about it, I knew God is doing something within me, strongly teaching me to be more grateful, to trust Him more, and be more forgiving... Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice 

[Eph 4:25-32]

And it felt so much better after I presented the case to directly to the person, it lifted up the burden within the silent me.

Devil is the father of liars! He knows what you well and he will attack you in your weak spot, and make the fear paralyze you from doing the right thing so he can then condemn you for your misdeeds!And he doesn't give up easily! I just realized as I wrote, he kept trying, using different people, and the closer they are to you, the more impact it has on you! So my conflict with housemate could be resolved, then he changed his strategy to involve my friends! Jeez, that was a greater of disappointment I experienced, but from all these, I came to realize that I have grown a fear of conflict and worse, rejection... It had been within me growing up, but I thought it's gone long time ago, apparently it's just been buried and now it sprung up! I believe God is warning me to come back to Him and His truth to empower me to live in Christ. It is not by power nor by might but by the Spirit of God [Zec 4:6], and the sword of the Spirit is the word of God [Eph 6:17]